I've been dealing with a sick parent in another city (he nearly died), personal drama and that of a close friend. No time to write, edit or anything. I'm all burned out from NaNo and not even doing Holidailies on my other blog. Feh.
I've been scarce. The brain drain of NaNo made it so my life sorta backed up and all the little accordian folds have been barfing up their hidden treasures/errands/events/dramas, and I've been dealing with them.
The mss is printed out, here next to me and unedited. I still need to do more writing before I go back and edit. Still in writing/creator mode. DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU IT'S TIME TO EDIT, until it is.
love and kuesse,
Jay
but not finished... this is an incomplete first draft, rather an embarrassment to my literary executor if I get run over by a bus tonight.
BUT!
I have 50,558 words and I will tie up some loose thoughts later tonight. But I'm done for about a week or so. I got stuff to do, people!
I'll take a victory lap from now until Saturday night when the local TGIO party is. And then it's xmas cards, house clean-up, xmas tree, shopping, yoga, quilting, stuff.
I'm rather amazed at myself. I really was ready to quit at 25K. and even though there is a lot of stuff in this draft that will undoubtedly get chucked out, it's there now, adding flavors to the novel stew. (Like bay leaf!)
Time for some choccies. Reese's anyone?
Current word count: 49632 (99.26 %) with 3 days left, with current pace, expected to finish in 2 days.
You know, I have to say that I have the makings of an interesting, possibly funny, possibly literary novel here. But not at the moment, it's not a novel. It's like cats being gathered by Animal Control from a hoarder's house. It's like marbles at the Capitol Rotunda. It's like on open bag of linguine falling out of the cupboard.
But it's fun and it's mine and I'll get to play with it for weeks to come.
must.sleep.now.
While Friday and Saturday were all about throwing all kinds of crap onto the screen and making it stick (for now), last night and today have been all about getting back to that weird writing place that I love. Telling stories in a rambly style that is the way people talk and think (in my world). It's GREAT fun.
Had lunch with a friend who threw some ideas my way, but mostly we talked about stuff for which we already have a shorthand and foreknowledge... so it was like just coming into the middle of the decades long conversation.
Had a drink later with a newer friend who is sharp, witty, hawt, funny and full of his own kind of stories. He pitched me a character, and by the time I sat down at the keyboard later that night, I had her voice and her story. And I found a way to put her in Tucson. It was such fun. This morning, the main MC spoke to me from inside his heart and soul. That was an honor.
And I have 45K now. I'll "win" NaNo but I have about half a novel. There is still much to be done with these people... I'm thinking 80 or 100K. Still, I'm not.there.yet, so I press on for four and a half more days, and then party like it's 1999, and get the house ready for the holidays.
I'm over 30K. Rah. 31,038 and counting. I'm using all the dastardly fluff techniques *that will serve me later* that I can. EX: John is now John Paul. For now. Seriously. It will go back to John after NaNo. I'm so proud.
I discovered tonight that 7pm is my arsenic hour. We used to refer to "dinnertime" as arsenic hour when Wonder boy was little. Though I never had horrible trouble with him, it was the time of day when he just decompensated as a tiny colicky baby. And so he cried through until 8 or 9 (usually during Law & Order) and then he'd fall asleep.
Part of this had undoubtedly been hardwired into me, and so now I'm doing some kind of Post Colic Stress Disorder thing. Or perhaps it's a Pre-Alzheimer's "sundowning." Whatever it is, 7pm to around 9:30 is when I am the most anxious, freaky and unglued about whatever major stressor there is that day.
Maybe that's why Prime Time TV is scheduled then. Hmmmm.
Anyway, all the issues that I was facing at 7pm are still there, but not sitting in the chair and forcing myself to write during that was most wonderful. I don't even care now if I don't get to 50K by 11/30. I know when I need to write, when I can write and how much I could lay down in an hour, given a quiet, free hour.
I can't tell if I'm angsting about my own life, or about this novel. If I'm fretting about life and thus it spills over to the book, or vice versa.
Oh and, NaNo's website is so damn slow today. I am NOT going to be able to update my latest word count: 28408, thank you. So I do it here. *pout*
As a test of the above theory, I will go completely offline, away from the keyboard and off the cell phone tomorrow morning. I'm taking the kid on a hike.
Ok, Paul, I'm sorry, I had to do it. I couldn't write you as Paul. I was having trouble liking you as Paul. The first name also did not work with the last name. So I changed that, and then I thought well, what a stupid first name with that last name.
I like John, my brother is one and I dated one (he was hawt). John is also a Beatle (not so secret subtext in a book about a BAND. Duh.).
So John you are. Meet yourself, John. I've already searched and replaced. "Paul" can be just our little secret, mkay?
So with that, I hope to break through 29K words today *IF* I don't get all nutty in the kitchen or with the shiraz.
I hit 25K, which is a straw man. It's my personal goal, but I'm still only about 30% of the way through the crucial heart of the book. I have the structure, but now need to apply the wiring, plumbing, insulation, wallboard, paint, etc. If you're following my wonderful metaphor.
On the iPod Shuffle, right now, Hard Day's Night. And amen.
I have been pretty sad all afternoon and evening. As I was writing a scene where nearly all of the five main characters are gathered, and projecting the journey ahead of them, I realized that one of them will die this day.
and I'm filled with such sadness. It's the last day of his life (yes, it's a he), and I want it to be the best one ever. And there will be a song about a best day ever... possibly a Green Day cover by the band, maybe just an a capella something on the bus.
And so now, I have to make his character really loveable. Because my readers MUST feel as sad as I am right now. Sorry. That's fiction.
;-)
